Do you know that feeling, that you have to do something.....but can´t quite remember what?
This story is just that.
I remember being told to write it but I can´t remember what I was supposed to tell you. What I do know is that everything I am going to tell you really happened, even though it may unbelievable sometimes.
Hit Rewind to start from Chapter One
Chapter 10
Talking to the ´Little One´ living in the feet of my wife always felt very enlightening, it lifted up my spirit as if I was producing some alternate chemicals.
I got this amazing sense of well-being, of things being right and at peace. While I normally always felt this unrest and unease no matter where I was.
Her presence was calming like some sort of drug, and doing a better job than any of the drugs I have been taking. And just like a good drug, her visits had the tendency to leave my mind clouded.
Or better when she would be there I felt connected. I could see more clearly than ever before. But as soon as she left it was like I was waking from a dream, having a hard time remembering details, still knowing shards of the conversation but feeling like missing the key takeaways.
Over time I started putting together an idea of what happened during those visits.
Something triggered an altered state of consciousness. You might recognize this enlightened sensation you sometimes feel when reading a book, learning a language, playing brain games, or even socializing with people. Well it felt kinda similar.
So what if these people I was socializing with were playing brain games with me?
Do I sound paranoid?
It is just that such a feeling is what came closest to my experience.
Another explanation might be the information I received and the situation I was in. Both were too intense for my brain to handle causing the brain fog I experienced.
That might explain why during meditations I often can see through the fog. It is almost like I am meant to see through it at that moment. As if the information I received during their visits planted little subconscious seeds that would sprout when the time was right.
Enough Psychobabble, you will need to make up your own mind about what is real, if you are able to do so.
Real is only limited by perception and if I learned one thing it is that my eyes are not made to perceive what is real.
Even though that is what I used to believe; if I can see it, and feel it, it´s real. Well, that would make a fart unreal.
Today I am quite sure that our eyes, and our senses in general, are developed for survival purposes only. Well, that and maybe procreation.... because you would not want to end up doing it with a monkey because you were not able to see, feel or smell the difference.
Early twenties me was just learning that his simple structured belief might be incorrect.
That change in perception might have had something to do with the fact that I was frequently visited by the Little One, who seemed to enjoy the freedom, the control, and the company of "Daddy Tiny." Just fyi that was because of my name being Martijn and not my size.
I too was getting used to these visits and starting to enjoy them. That probably also had to do with her telling me about her education. This kid was taught very different things in her school than I was at mine.
I mean I was never taught to not trust what my eyes were telling me.
I was not told that one day people will find a cure for many diseases in something so mundane as a tomato.
Nor was I told about Maria Magdalena being the lover of Jesus and fledging to Europe with his blood.
Or, Jesus being a descendant from a royal bloodline, and once his royal blood arrived in France it was protected and anonymized by a brotherhood of men. No, she did not mention Jewish or Priory of Sion.
Now one can argue that she secretly watched the Davinci Code together with her body´s host, wasn´t it for the fact that the movie did not hit the cinemas till late 2006.
So maybe she read the book, well maybe the script, for the draft of the book. Because I was told this story in 1998 five years before the book.
All the little facts and little seeds that I received during our conversations were like reading an exciting story. This type of talk did elevate my spirits, although nowadays I do think there was more to it.
Transferring energy was definitely not something I believed in, but looking back I wonder why not?
Have you never felt the energy changing when someone entered the room? When someone took the stage, when someone touches you?
As I said our eyes are blind as a bat when it comes to seeing stuff that is not directly life-threatening. Hence we only see the transmission of energy when made visible, like lightning. Yet it is said there are many different ways of transmitting energies.
Now I believe in smoke and mirrors, but I also believe that where there is smoke, there is fire.
The usage of healing energy for example. This suggestion has been around a lot longer than modern medicine. If something exists for such a long time there is a lot of hocus pocus attributed to it. For an old wives tale to survive that long, wouldn´t there be something to those stories that might actually carry some value?
Therefore I do not think I am utterly crazy for thinking that they messed with my energy levels. Yes, I am saying "they," and I will get to that in a minute.
Why do I think there was more than just elevated energy levels, for one because those "they" also often cleaned my third eye, the one good eye, and my crown chakra.
Things I did not even know I possessed, till they blew off the layers of dust that had gathered there during that first ´blind´ episode of my life.
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