How To Deal With That First, Rough Morning In Heaven...

A Theological Fantasy story about a humorous situation that may never have occurred to you...

Hello, my friend! This story is for you, regardless of your religious persuasion.

You may be a fellow-believer in Jesus my God (commonly known as "a Christian"). Or, you may not be. Either way, you're always welcome here. I'd like to think you'll enjoy the ride regardless of our divergent beliefs.

If you happen to be a believer, I invite you to use your "sanctified imagination" to try to picture the following scenario.

If you do not yet share my faith in Jesus, you need not rush off... Please, simply enjoy the following as a bit of fantasy writing, OK?

Coffee Beans Growing

Coffee Beans Growing

Photo courtesy of Katya Austin and http://unsplash.com


Here's the background setting for this story:

The end of the world has finally come.

Judgement day is now over; Jesus-God has purged the universe with flaming, holy fire, and you and I have just awakened to our very first morning on The New Earth.

Awakening on the New Earth

Awakening on the New Earth

Photo courtesy of Julian Hanslmaier and http://unsplash.com

I am, of course, so very delighted

to find that you are my neighbor today, sharing this glorious morning with me! The universe is laid out at our feet; we're ready for anything.

Please imagine with me now, that we're watching the scene unfold as if watching ourselves in a film.

If you listen closely, you can hear our conversation...

ME: Good Morning!

YOU: Hi!

ME: How are you doing this morning? No, wait; that's a stupid question! We're on the New Earth.

YOU: You're right. I am, of course, doing phenomenally well. Aren't these new bodies great?

ME: Frickin' awesome! I've never felt better in my entire life!

Glorious New Earth

Glorious New Earth Vista

Photo courtesy of Eutah Mizushima and http://unsplash.com

OK, now that you've got the setting,

I'll dispense with scriptwriter's notation and simply recount our conversation.

"So, what shall we do first?"

"I don't know. Possibilities are pretty much unlimited, aren't they?"

"Indeed. Why don't we discuss our options over a cup of coffee?"

"Sounds good to me!"

However, looking around us, we see nothing but fruit trees, spectacular scenery, lush vegetation, and gorgeous, gentle animals.

A Restful Tiger

A Restful Tiger

Photo courtesy of Chang Hsien and http://unsplash.com

A restful tiger lounges off to one side.

Lamb and lion frolick together in a nearby glade. We look at one another, and I say "Houston, we may have a problem here. Exactly where and how are we supposed to get that cuppa coffee?"

QFront-Shibuya-04

A Former Starbucks Location

Image courtesy of Wikimedia Commons

"I guess Starbucks was vaporized in the judgement, wasn't it?"

"Along with all the rest of civilization, eh?"

So, it seems, we're "back to the garden." Here we are, standing on one brand-spanking new, completely refurbished planet, fully and abundantly stocked with all the plants and animals that we need.

"So, what's a fellow have to do to get a cup of Joe around here?"

"Do you happen to recall where in the world near here we might find some coffee growing?"

As it happens, we are in Southern California.

"Well, there's coffee for sure on the Kona coast of Hawaii - you know, The Big Island?"

"That's a mighty long swim; not sure I'm up for that today."

"We do have new bodies that presumably could make the trip."

"I think I'd prefer an overland route for our first adventure, wouldn't you?"

"Fine with me. Where's your car?"

"My what? Have you forgotten already? Um, that little thing called the Judgement? You know, flaming fire consuming every last man-made thing?"

"Damn!, that's right! No planes, trains, or automobiles yet!"

Carte Coffea robusta arabic

World Map of Coffee Bean Growing Areas

Image courtesy of Wikimedia Commons

"I hope you're ready to go for a nice, long stroll..."

"OK... If I remember correctly, coffee grows on mountainsides in tropical countries, right?"

"Yes! OK, so, I guess we head south, then..."

"How long do you think that's gonna take us?"

"No worries, bro; we've got eternity, remember?"

After a quick "dead reckoning" session (Sun rises in the east? So, if we keep the sun on our left, we're heading south, right?) we begin walking.

We walk in silence for quite a distance, each with thoughts of our own. Then the conversation begins again.

Coffee Tech

Just A Bit of Coffee Technology

Photo courtesy of Crew and http://unsplash.com

As we pull back from the scene,

you can hear our intrepid adventurers gradually remembering and beginning to discuss out loud a few of the remaining obstacles between them and their first cup of coffee.

"Won't we need some kind of roasting equipment?"

"How do we start a fire, rub two sticks together?"

"I think Vern knows something about that."

"How the heck are we going to find Vern?

"Wait, do you know anything about mining for iron? What about metalurgy? Have you ever been to a foundry?"

"What are we going to grind it with, a mortar and pestle??"

"Deep, deep sigh..."

Glorious Wilderness

Glorious Wilderness

Photo courtesy of Jorge Illich-Gejo and http://unsplash.com

We head towards the hills, into the beautiful, pristine wilderness,

moving very gradually towards what used to be southern Mexico. That is where we hope to find some coffee plants growing wild on the mountainsides.

Coffee Mountain

Coffee Mountain

Photo courtesy of Sudarshan Bhat and http://unsplash.com

If this were the old world, we'd be dragging by now...

"Couldn't we just check in with an angel or something and see if he'd fix us up with a cup of coffee?"

"Aw, what fun would that be?"

"Oh, just shut up and keep walking!"


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More Posts About Heaven...

Eternity: A Mind-Numbingly Powerful Perspective
Why You Need to Know that Jesus is My LORD (And No Other Need Apply)
Heaven? No, I Mean the Real, Ultimate Heaven...
Enter Only: One Way


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