My parents and I have two furbabies. B is a 3-yr old female Beagle while C is an 11-month old male half Beagle, half Aspin. C is actually B's son. We have a limited space at the place we are currently staying at, so both of them share one cage. It's not too big yet not too small. Just enough for them to both lie down or walk a few steps. Initially, there were no issues, not until C became big enough to explore his reproduction capabilities. Uh-oh. Long story short, B got pregnant. I was super upset at first because C was such a baby for me, and I can't accept the fact that he got his mom pregnant!!! I know that for some people, it's normal and is not a big deal because they are "just" dogs, but in my head, they should have stayed as a mother-and-son. Okay, enough with my rants. Haha
We were not sure when exactly they did "it", so it was quite hard to tell how many weeks in B already was. We just felt that she would give birth around September. The past week, B got extra clingy and demanding. Every night, she would call us because she didn't want to sleep inside the cage. I knew that this was partly because of her pregnancy, so I tried to be as patient as I can (although I also got annoyed at times hehe).
The night of Septemer 8, when I was about to give B and C their dinner, I noticed that B stayed lying down, which was quite a surprise. Usually, she is the one demanding us for her food. Then I remembered that one of the signs that a dog is about to litter is when she is refusing to eat. I informed my Mama about my hunch.
While I was getting something, Mama exclaimed that she could see something coming out from B. I quickly ran to take a look, and I did see something, too! It looked like a water balloon stuck in her vulva. Shortly, my Papa, nephew and niece came to watch. It kinda became a family event. Haha. We initially wanted to take B out of the cage so we can assist her better. But at that moment, we were all scared she might get hurt or that she might not like being moved at that state. We took C out, instead.
A bit later though, I insisted they should switch places because that just makes more sense. Everyone agreed, but no one wanted to do it themselves. And since I am currently the official guardian, I had to take on the duty. lol. I petted B first to get a feel of her mood. I could no longer see that water balloon-ish thing, but I wasn't so sure because so much things were going on. A few minutes later, I slowly took her out of the cage. And true enough, the water balloon thing was no longer there.
Hours passed by but there was still no pup coming out. I would see her try to push but only small portions of clear fluid would come out. My family went back to their rooms, one at a time, until I was the only one left with B. A few hours later, I decided to go to the room, too, but I kept on checking on her from time to time.
Around 2AM, I checked on B again. I noticed that there was something with her, and she was eating it! I gathered up my thoughts first while staring at what was happening. Then I saw a portion of the body of a puppy, and that was when I realized that B was eating her placenta!!!
It was the first time ever that I witnessed a dog with her newborn pup, let alone eating her placenta. I was just standing still while watching them. It was a beautiful sight, especially when B started licking the pup. When she ate up all the placenta and the pup was all by itself, I noticed something weird. It was so still. Part of me was worried, but another part of me was keeping myself calm. I told myself that maybe newborn pups really don't move right away. I looked it up on the internet, but the ones I saw said that newborn pups already try to look for their mama's milk a few minutes after they are out.
I was kinda scared to touch it because B might get mad or the pup might really be dead. I woke my Mama instead, and she confirmed that it was indeed dead. She tried pumping the chest, but we knew we couldn't revive it. I also read online that mama dogs should be allowed to be with their dead pup for around 15 minutes so she, herself, could feel that her pup passed away already, and because suddenly separating it from her could cause anxiety, so that's what we did. When B was resting and not looking at her pup, we took that as an opportunity to get the pup. Shortly, B suddenly got up and walked around, seemingly looking for her pup. There was even a point when she howled. It sounded like she was crying. 😢 It was really heartbreaking to witness.
I stayed with B for a several more minutes before going back to my room. Again, I continued on checking on B from time to time. It was already around 4AM when I finally decided to take a rest. Good thing our classes on Thursdays start at around 10AM, so I still had a few hours sleep.
Before my class started on the 9th, I checked on B, and I saw something. It was another puppy. Another dead puppy. This one looked horrible and kawawa. Half of its body was still inside the placenta. I can still recall how it looked like, but I couldn't or don't know how to describe it. It was way worse that the first dead pup.
I thought that another passing away of B's baby wouldn't affect me as much anymore, but I still found myself shedding tears for the 2nd pup. At this point, part of me was already preparing myself for the worst, while staying hopeful for alive pups.
The day went on. I had class. I ate lunch. When I was about to feed C, our other dog, I saw something again. At first I thought it was a garbage or something, but when B walked towards it, I realized it was a pup! I stared at it nervously. I tried to look for signs of movement. When I was about to declare another death, the puppy's leg moved!!!! It moved!!! But before getting myself excited, I stared a few more seconds because yknow, I might just have seen things. lol. But then, it suddenly changed its position!!
Without thinking whether or not B will mind, I immediately wore my gloves and picked the baby up! I was soooo happy! Sakto pa, my nephew came out so I shared with him the news. We were ecstatic! I kept on telling B that she did a great job, that she did it! Grabe. It felt like all the pain I had because of the first two deaths were washed away. I put the baby down near B and just watched as it weakly crawled (which actually looked like it was swimming hahaha) Oh! I checked if it was a male or female, and from my non-expert opinion, I guess it was a female. Haha Not sure, though.
I had a short Art class at 2PM, so I told my nephew to check on B while I was away. When my class ended, I headed to her right away, and was surprised to see another moving puppy with her!!! Gossssh!! Two died, but two moving puppies were here, too! It was so cute pa 'cause it started making noises also. Huhuhu babiiesss. They were so adorable! B was feeding and licking them so I felt more confident on leaving them. I took a nap because I was super tired. Haha.
When I woke up around 5PM, my body still wanted to be glued on bed, but something was bugging me to check on B again, so I did. When I got to her, I saw something dangling on her bottom!!!! Waaaah! I moved to another side, and the next thing I knew, it was already on the spot together with the other pups. Haha. The placenta was already torn, but it was still there. I saw how B ate it, and how she cut the ambilical cord (is it the right term??) But when I looked at the pup, I can already tell that it wasn't alive. B licked its face and all, but it was unresponsive.
I was either toughened by the two previous deaths or my happiness for the two alive ones were overpowering, but I handled this one well. When several minutes passed already, I took the dead baby pup away. It was the first dead pup that I dared to touch. It was cold, but it looked like a sleeping angel. B looked for it and even headed to where it was. Haaaaay. It was heartwarming yet heartbreaking to look at.
Septemer 10
This was probably one of the longest days I've had.
When I got out of bed around 8AM, of course, I checked on B and the babies. One puppy was lying on top of the other. Hahahha Soo cute! But aside from that, I noticed something weird. The puppy underneath the other... it was not moving. I stared at them keenly for a good number of seconds just to be sure. When B was quite away, I took it out to check. And true enough, it was not breathing and a bit still already. 😢 I looked for an old shirt and covered the puppy with it. I had to prepare for class already, so I just left it there. Not naman inside the space where the other pup was, but it was still quite near.
I cried so hard in the bathroom. I just couldn't accept why the baby pup had to die, when it was okay last night. (Later that day, Mama also told me that she saw that baby still alive around 4 or 5AM huhu) When I finished changing, I went back to them and saw the dead pup with B again. She took it back! huhu She was even licking it. 😢 Poor mama dog. I felt sooo bad for her. But as much as I wanted her to stay with her baby, I had to separate it from them for their health. Haaay.
With a heavy and mourning heart, I went to class. My class partner was aware about my doggie situation and was kind enough to offer taking charge of most parts of the day.
Middle part of class, my Mama came in the room, holding the remaining alive puppy. Papa was in the room with me, and Mama was talking to him. I was super nervous na! I asked her if it was dead. She said no, but it seemed weak already, and either it won't 'eat," or B won't feed. But since I was still in class, I couldn't concentrate with our conversation. I just wanted time to pass quickly so our class will finally end. When it did, I hurriedly checked on the baby. Indeed, it got way weaker than it was before I had my class. It seemed to have a hard time breathing.
My head was all over the place. I didn't know what to do. But as much as I wanted to stay with them and make sure the baby stayed alive, I had to leave because Mama and I had our schedule for our 2nd dose of vaccine at 12:50PM, and it was already past 12NN then. I was already crying while preparing to leave.
When I went back to our room (I share a room with my parents), my Mama told me that we couldn't do anything about it even if I cry. My Papa also said something but I got super duper upset and mad about the whole situation that I ended up yelling at them. I told them to let me be and to not mind me. I even exclaimed, "Bakit ba? Bawal ba umiyak? Bawal ba malungkot? Wag niyo nga ako pansinin! Hayaan niyo nga ako!" They said nothing in return; I booked a Grab; Mama and I headed to MakatiMed for our 2nd dose.
Even while in the car, I couldn't stop thinking about the remaining pup, B, and all the other pups. I tried to stop myself, by my tears kept on falling. Hayyy
When we got to MakatiMed, the line for the elevator going to the vaccination area was a bit slow because one scheduled vaccination day was moved to that day as well. Buti nalang na when we got to the vaccination area, the flow was smooth.
After Mama and I finished all the steps, I booked a Grab right away. Partly to see the puppy already and partly because Mama was feeling dizzy. By this time, I kinda already felt that we won't be seeing any alive puppy anymore. But when I did see another dead puppy for real, I lost it. I cried hard. For the puppy. For B. For me.
I took it out. Mama cleaned the area and I tried to comfort B. I felt like we were both mourning together. B was super lethargic. I kept her company for a few hours, especially because I saw that she was still contracting and discharging fluids. It's so crazy, if we think about it. It was already 2 days after she started labor, yet she seemed to still have one more puppy to push out. I was already expecting that the baby would come out dead, and that probably was one reason why it was extra hard for B to push it out. And honestly, at that point, I no longer cared whether or not the baby will survive. I just prayed that it would finally come out so B can take a rest.
B was exhausted and mourning. It was super painful to witness, that I couldn't help but weep. My tears kept on falling and falling, as I gently massaged B's tummy.
As I mentioned earlier, I got my 2nd dose that day, and I started feeling a headache. I guess it was partly because of the dosage and partly because I cried too much. So after I got changed, I lied down to rest and soon fell into a nap.
My body felt heavy that I wanted to skip dinner and just doze off, but I had to fight it because I needed to attend on B again. When I finished my dinner, I checked on her, and finally, the last baby came out already. As expected, it was dead. But I felt more relieved than sad, honestly. At least now, B would no longer suffer from painful contractions and discomfort.
I know what most of you might be thinking or wondering now. Why didn't we bring B to the vet? Why was I doing all the work?
First, I badly wanted to bring B to the vet from that time pa when she started to be in labor and especially when dead puppies kept on coming out. But the truth is, we couldn't afford a vet right now. It would be super expensive, especially when there was a possibiity that she will undergo a c-section. I really felt super guilty and scared. I just kept on praying that B would get through this. And I am glad that she did.
Second, I was the one who mainly attended on B because she wouldn't allow anyone near her or her baby, but me. She would get mad. So I had to do all the main work, but Mama was there to assist me with the babies or the cleaning up of the space, while I consulted or informed Papa from time to time about the updates on them.
Haaaaay. That chapter was over, but we are in another one-- B's recovery stage.
Ever since she lost her pups, B got extra clingy and needy. She wants me to be with her all the time, and would look for me when I am not around. I don't mind, but it also kinda gets annoying sometimes, especially at night. Last night, I even stayed with her until around 1 or 2 AM or else she would bark, which isn't ideal because she has a loud voice.
It does take so much patience to take care of fur babies, especially ones who lost their pups. I feel like B still looks for her babies until now. huhu. I am just glad that her appetite is slowly coming back, and hopefully, she'll be totally okay na soon.
I'd like to end this post with this Bible verse that popped in my screen the other day, while feeling down about the whole situation.
"God blesses those who mourn, for they will be comforted." -Matthew 7:12
herkeepsake
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