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Finance matters if not discussed during courtship can pose a real challenge. Open communication and mutual understanding is needed to handle finances for the growth and financial stability of a family.
Some marriages have thrived over the years without either partner revealing details of their earnings. Some others I believe have succeeded and kept succeeding due to the openness of both partners regarding their finances, so it depends on the couple involved.
Betty, married to Emily, worked hard and saved from her high paying job. She wanted to relocate her family abroad. Unsure if her husband would agree, especially if he learns of how much she had saved, decided not to spill. But her friend advised her to let her husband know about it.
One evening, while having dinner, she told her husband how she had secretly saved up a huge amount and also made her intention of trying to help the entire family relocate. Surprised about how much she had saved, despite the financial challenges they had both faced, he appreciated the wife for telling him finally. That discussion led into more talk about their earnings, dreams, aspirations, expectations and how to go about relocating. In the end, the husband was proud of her and together they supported the movement and they were happy it worked out well.
Revealing details of your finances to your husband can be advantageous:
It fosters trust - Your partner believes in your commitment to the relationship and strengthens the bond of union as you are open and transparent to each other.
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It helps in financial planning - Those who are in a joint account with their partner understand this better. You can put your spending in check, making informed decision, proper budgeting and reduce impulse buying by communicating your pay package to your spouse.
Empowerment and Equality - When the finances of a woman is known by her partner, depending on the couple, she can be allowed to take some decisions on behalf of the family. That makes her feel relevant and in a way equal to the better half she is part of from the origin of the marriage.😃. Not dragging headship though but somehow showing that she is valued for her financial independence.
Financial security - Knowing each other's financial status can help the family plan for projects, retirement and other unexpected expenses.
Like I mentioned earlier, it depends on the couple.
Sad to say, some marriages have crumbled or reached a breaking point because the man had insight of the wife's earning.
Mr Alex for example ( permit me to call him that) fell in love with a rich lady, Sonia (another name changed). He didn't know the financial status of the fiancee and she didn't reveal either, because she felt their relationship was new and she needed someone to love her for who she was not what she has.
One day, Mr Alex ran into a colleague of Sonia's, whom upon finding that Alex was in a serious relationship with Sonia, told him " You hit a jack pot man. Do not lose her". Surprised at this revelation, Alex confronted Sonia with it. Sonia then revealed her finances to Alex but told him that she wanted someone to love her genuinely, not for what she has. She told him about her assets too.
A few months later, they got married. Immediately after their wedding, Alex demanded that Sonia changed everything she owned to his name and make him the next of kin to everything including the house she put on rentage. Sonia was very disappointed. This caused a rancor between them; there was constant bickering, nothing else Sonia did mattered except that she should do as Alex had said.
Before long, Alex started cheating on her, giving her some attitudes that she termed emotional abuse and silent treatment. The home became unbearable for her until she decided to move out for a while.
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What's the lesson in this post? Study your partner well. Love, mutual understanding, openness, trust and commitment to the relationship will help you chose when to reveal and how much to reveal your finances. Haha. Should it be revealed in bits?
Please prevent misunderstanding in your relationship by avoiding hidden earnings. If you have love among yourselves, you will both manage your finances without consideration of who owns what. 😅 To reveal or not to reveal remains a matter of choice and preference of the couple involved. But you can watch where the relationship is heading to, better to reveal finances to a husband than a boyfriend. Hahaha.
Some men don't ask, they don't even want to know, provided they are doing their best for their family and expect commitment, respect , appreciation and full support and cooperation from their wives when broke.
This is my entry into ladies of hive contest #145.
Thanks for stopping by. I appreciate.