For the past five years, my whole existence has been like that of a mere plant. As essential as I could be deemed in most cases, I was still pretty much at the mercy of the weather. I had to adapt to whatever atmosphere the days came with, and here I am, it's still basically what it is.
Verbally, I could say I am slightly a mess, I don't talk a lot in public but consume the most conversations with myself, and yea, this has greatly helped me understand the art of being the holder of your piece of mind.
OK, this article may really contradict the whole "be yourself" theory that's often a motivational speaker's favorite combination. People believe that being yourself means having to display one nature. That's a Paradox, so I disagree to agree. Nature is constant but never the same, it's wonders which is unveiled by time totally doesn't go with the rhythm of "one" It expands, becomes more complicated. More mysterified…
Understanding my daily Clones!
As a teenager, a very small circle understands my nature. The circle is quite small that it contains only "me" "myself" and "I"
At some point, people began calling me fake in school, saying this and that. How my actions could never be detected, but I actually loved this experience, it helped me be me but then still without letting anyone know "me"
Some day, I decided I wanted to create a little light to help people see that my life was actually an open book, it's just that they all be skipping pages, maybe because everyone lived in the dark, so it was harder to see any truth.
I created a "clone system" to help everyone understand why I look, talk, and behave differently everyday.
There was a happy clone, a sad clone, a proud clone, a friendly clone, a naive clone, an evil clone, and many more.
This was to help them understand that I switch moods as the day changes, days don't turn out the same so why should I? I never lived based on people's expectations, it helps me satisfy myself, balance my nature and please no mortal.
"when you realize your dark side collides inside, you run as fast as you can but you can't hide"
Back to "me" "myself" and "I"
me - the soul
myself - the body
I - the Angel and Demon (Two Faced Spirit)
OK, enough about what people think and how to live differently, we've got real problems, and that's ourselves. Firstly, I'd love to say that I've never read a book in my life! Now saying that may totally placed me at a spot where you see me as a dummy, I totally get it how I am the dumb one but you all choose to read what others wrote and believe it, and just cause another person doesn't or haven't read it, he becomes the stupid one, hehe.
Living by books goes a long way to making you live life trying to imitate the author of those books. So in this case, you're no more you, right? Bummer right? Because in the quest to accept knowledge, you become a fool full of another man's personality traits. This is probably a cap, hell, don't take it too serious.
Most people believe the flesh or body of man is the enemy. Well, I don't believe that crap anymore. The body is only the second slave after the soul. The soul is usually trapped, you rarely have the most of it on earth. It's the real you, that's the piece that creates existence, that's the life in us. Mortals ain't got no spirit. So I relent to use "my spirit" as a point of discussion because I don't have one! There was a recent shit I discovered, call it a revelation. Ever heard of a spirit dying? No right? Angels don't die, likewise Demons which are basically the same shit just that we were borned to hear, the demons are the bad ones.
Humans ain't got no spirit, they ain't immortals, the spirits around us are there to either lead us left or right, so we all are like puppets on strings.
The real human is the body and soul. A human can pretty much do without spirits, it will be free and loving ferial. Take animals for example, you think they have spirits? No! They just exist, act differently on different occasions. They only got a soul and body, they ain't no angel or demon following them. The spirits ( which are two in number - Angel and Demon) are what entirely influences our entire existence. The soul is never given a chance to be free until the body dies, so it's a slave trapped in there, and then, the body is what the spirit plays around with.
"In her soul, dark and light fight for control, nobody knows"
Believe it or not, there's no such thing as being bad and being good, there's just a bunch of spirits controlling us all. We're left to play by their rules because the only free will creation is trapped within, and that's the soul. When one learns to control these spirits, he learns to bring to light his nature. It's not impossible, put in work.
quoted sections are lyrics from a song by Juice Wrld titled "Run" I wrote this in a cold night with this song playing in my head, it probably has a thing or two to do with how this article turned out, but anyways, I'll stop here because I can feel my head hurting.
Thanks for reading…